So 2011 ushered itself in quietly to the Divine Mrs. M's abode amongst spouse, teenagers, a dance competition to the Michael Jackson Experience and a mean game of Pictionary with the fancy UDraw tablet for the Wii which the Divine Mrs. M received as a Christmas present. The one thing missing from this low-key celebration? The need to declare a New Year's resolution.
We are now 4 days into this new year and by a show of hands ... who has already broken their New Year's resolution? Really? That many? Interesting ...
If you are like most Americans, your New Year's resolution is probably one of the following: (a) lose weight (or some variation of this); and/or (b) stop smoking, drinking, swearing, (enter bad habit here). It's not a coincidence that most major fitness facilities offer up specials that waive joining fees in January or that you see a rash of stop-smoking aid commercials throughout the month of December. You see ... the industry is on to us ... banking on us to spend our money on memberships that will hardly ever get used and aids to break bad habits only to end up throwing our money, along with our resolutions, out the window. Resolutions, while made with good intentions, are readily broken by the end of January, or if you are like me, by the end of the first week of the new year.
I think one of the major problems with New Year's resolutions are that they are vague. We say we are going to lose weight. How? Do we have the tools necessary to assist us? What steps are we going to take to accomplish this? How much weight? For how long? Have we set a goal?
We say we are going to stop smoking, drinking, swearing (enter bad habit here). When? Do we have a date set? Do we have a plan? How are we going to stop? Are we going to use the patch, nicotine gum, Chantix, join AA, put a dollar in a jar every time we say a bad word? Do we have the support of our family/friends/co-workers?
What is the plan???
That's a major problem ... no plan. A problem I have been struggling with for 20 years. I have meant it every time I've said I was going to get healthy and lose weight. And I did. And then I didn't. My goals were too vague. And much too broad. And my plan was flimsy at best. I know what I would like my goal weight to be ... and it's about 50 pounds lighter than I am at this moment. Well, 50 pounds seems like a very long, foreboding journey ... across the desert ... with no water. What if my goal were easier to reach ... like, I will not eat any deep-fried food today? Just today ... and if I make it through today ... then tomorrow I can make a new goal ... or keep the same one ... until I don't feel the need to make that my goal anymore because it's no longer a struggle to not eat deep-fried food.
My sister is Catholic. And like all good Catholic girls, she doesn't eat meat on Fridays and gives up something in recognition of Lent. In all of the years this beautiful girl has been in my life she has chosen to give up soda. Which sounds noble. Except she really doesn't drink soda. Doesn't even really like it. She's a water with lemon kind of gal. I've always found that fascinating ... her giving up something that she wouldn't miss. It definitely makes it easier not to slip ... but (and I am not Catholic nor am I judging) I'm sure that's not the point.
If I take her lead and apply it to New Year's, I could resolve to do a lot of things. For instance, I could resolve to buy at least 5 new designer handbags. Or buy more shoes. Or eat more potato chips. Maybe, I should resolve to take more naps!! Doesn't that sound delicious? Who doesn't love a good nap!!
But isn't the point of a New Year's resolution to better oneself over the upcoming year? I may buy 5 new designer handbags (and probably more if I'm honest), more shoes, eat potato chips and take a nap or two in 2011 ... and I may argue that resolving to do such wouldn't make me a bad person or any worse of a person than I was in 2010.
On the flip side, however, why make resolutions that aren't actually going to improve your way of life (as much as I think the handbags and shoes just may) and why make ones that are so difficult you are eventually going to break them?
I'm proposing a new way to look at resolutions ... I am resolving to make a new resolution every morning before I get out of bed. I have a notebook on my bedside table for recording these resolutions. The entry for January 1, 2011? "Make a new resolution every day." Done. You can repeat your resolutions ... daily ... monthly ... whatever works just as long as they "stick." Today's entry ... "Eat 3 fruits." Done. And it's not even quitting time yet. Why 3? I don't know ... I didn't want to eat 4. And yesterday I only ate 1.
The point is, I already made a resolution in 2010 to not be fat. I resolved it and I meant it and I'm tip-toeing toward it. Treading ever so softly so as not to fall on my fat, 40-year-old ass. I'm attempting to make healthy choices a habit ... in lieu of the number of bad habits I've been practicing for the past 40 years. It takes time. I'm not going to beat myself up over it. We should make resolutions all year long ... so we can evolve into our best selves. Resolving to be better shouldn't just be a once-a-year occasion. It should be a daily occasion.
It is so much easier for me to look at my little notebook and see my tiny resolution for the day and checking it off as an accomplishment instead of trying to tackle one giant thing over the course of 52 weeks/365 days. It's a lot less daunting ... and much more manageable. My notebook is actually a pocket calendar by the way ... because I don't think my resolutions need to be documented in paragraphs. I'm keeping it simple. I'm keeping it light. And I'm keeping my resolutions ... how about you?
© 2010-2011 Melanie L. Miller All Rights Reserved
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