For those of you who watch NBC's The Biggest Loser you are familiar with dreaded "Week 2." The trainers remind the contestants every day of how horrible Week 2 is while in the gym beating the crap out of them, the contestants walk around with dark clouds over their heads and there is an impending sense of doom and gloom on the BL ranch. Then ... the weigh in. Contestants are shaking and near tears before the big scale lights up to reveal their Week 2 weight loss. What inevitably follows is one or more versions of the following emotions: *GASP * TEARS * ANGER * FRUSTRATION * EXPLETIVES * And you want to know why these contestants are so upset? Because Johnny lost 22 pounds his first week on the ranch and this week .... oh no ... he only lost 5! Janie lost 13 pounds her first week on the ranch and this week ... wait for it ... she lost only 1! OMG ... whatever will they do???? It's the Biggest Loser Week 2 Curse!!!! Give me a freakin' break.
I have successfully completed Week 2 of my weight loss plan and am now knee deep into Week 3. I didn't lose an average of 7 pounds per week like Janie or 13.5 per week like John. No ... I actually gained a pound this week and am hanging tight to an average of 2 pounds per week. I'm happy with that. Because I don't live at the Biggest Loser Ranch. I don't have Jillian and Bob to work my ass out every minute of every day. I have a job and a husband and kids and, well, a life.
I will admit that Week 2 wasn't easy for me. For one thing ... someone helped themselves to my identity (i.e., bank card) and bought themselves what I assume to be a really nice Dell computer for Christmas. This theft resulted in my having to cancel my card, make another trip to see Jabba at the police station and going to the bank to apply for a new card. In the meantime, my "Meals on Wheels" (i.e, diet meal delivery plan) order for Week 2 was not able to process due to the canceled credit card. By the time I received my new card and corrected my billing information with Meals on Wheels, Week 2 was well underway and I was totally and completely on my own.
I'm not a dumb girl. I understand how diets work ... eat less, move more. Easy peasy lemon squeezie. Right? Wrong. The whole purpose of Meals on Wheels is to take the guesswork out of my caloric intake. The food is edible ... some of it is even tasty. I know grilled chicken is better than fried chicken (in terms of health ... not taste). I know that Pepsi is not as healthy or hydrating as water. I know that fruits and vegetables are better for you than potato chips and ice cream. I've got the basics down.
The basics are easy because it all comes down to common sense. What takes a little more work and where I tend to become confused is what to eat, when to eat it, how much of it to eat and what combination to eat it in. You see ... I can go to the store and stock up on everything considered to be "healthy." I can have a cart load of fresh fruit and vegetables; low fat dairy; lean meats and proteins and Lean Cuisines. I can have all of this in my diet arsenal and still be at a loss as to what to do with it.
There are too many conflicting reports out there in regard to what to eat, when to eat it and how much to eat. For example ... my abusive boyfriend WW says that a serving of protein should be about the size of your cell phone. Well, what does that mean exactly? I have an iPhone ... my husband a Blackberry ... my mother an ancient "flip" phone. Whose cell phone should I be referencing? I would pick the Blackberry because it's the largest ... but that's just me .... or is it?
There are studies that show that you should have 2-3 servings of dairy per day and it will help you lose weight. What constitutes a serving? What kind of dairy should you have? Is drinking 1/2 cup of whole milk as beneficial as drinking a 1/2 cup of fat-free milk? Is low-fat yogurt as beneficial as regular yogurt? Do you still get the same health benefits from a piece of low-fat string cheese as opposed to whole milk string cheese?
Studies say you are supposed to have 8 servings of fruits and vegetables every day ... hmmmm ... what is the fruit to vegetable ratio? Do I have 4 fruits and 4 vegetables or 2 fruits and 6 vegetables? Do I just drink a V8 and be done with it? Probably not, because fruit and vegetables in their liquid form lose more of their nutritional value than when consumed in their original form ... I heard that on Dr. Oz.
Fat in your diet is important to a healthy lifestyle ... yea, I said it ... fat is healthy for you. If it's the right kind of fat. EVOO (if you don't know what that is then you should check your local TV listings for Rachel Ray) is an excellent source of the "right kind of fat." However, when using EVOO for cooking, how much can you use before it goes from being healthy to unhealthy?
We have heard for years that carbs are bad for you. My dad did the no-carb diet and lost a lot of weight ... and ended up in the hospital with kidney stones. His doctor told him by eliminating most carbs from his diet, his kidneys were not able to function properly as his body was working over-time in order to process the overload of protein in his diet and kidney stones developed. I guess this condition was quite common when the "no carb" fad hit the shelves.
Did you know that a lot of salads (just the name "salad" makes you think "healthy") have more calories than a Big Mac? They do! Read Eat This Not That. It's my favorite book because it will show you that in some cases a cupcake may be more beneficial to you health wise than a chef's salad. You see, if you look hard enough and search far enough you can find a diet that looks good on paper but doesn't actually help you lose any weight at all. It's the search for the Holy Grail ... in my case it's more the Monty Python version but whatever.
Without my Meals on Wheels I was terrified to eat much of anything at all. I chose the grilled chicken. I ordered carrot and celery sticks as my appetizer at a restaurant when my husband and daughter ordered deep fried pretzels and onion rings. I ate a Lean Cuisine pizza at my son's birthday party while everyone else feasted on gooey cheesy pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut. I had one can of Diet orange Crush while everyone else drank ice cold Pepsi (my most favorite thing in the whole wide world and had two bites of my son's ice cream cake after singing Happy Birthday. Overall, a pretty good week. And still ... I gained a pound.
My BFF said that perhaps I didn't eat enough. That your body can go into starvation mode and slow the metabolism down. My husband said that perhaps I didn't eat the right combination of food or have the right portion sizes. You see? Explanations as to why the weight didn't come off are just as diverse and confusing as diets themselves.
I'm not upset by that pound but, seriously, had I known it was going to be there come Monday morning ... I would have munched on an onion ring, had a slice of the gooey pizza and ate more of that ice cream cake. But I guess that's how I got into this sinking ship in the first place ... by thinking like THAT. I did really well all on my own for Week 2. No Meals on Wheels as a crutch. No WW meeting. Nothing. Just Me vs. Food. And I think I did okay.
For now I think I'll just go the Biggest Loser route and say that I did everything perfectly and my weight gain is just a product of dreaded Week 2 ...
© 2010-2011 Melanie L. Miller All Rights Reserved
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